A New Year’s Resolution

I used to consider myself an introvert. I fit the bill: I need alone time after being around large groups of new people for extended time periods and I place a high value on being able to be comfortably undisturbed at my house. But I’ve lately felt a bit ridiculous using the term “introvert” to apply to myself because I fail miserably at actually providing purposeful alone time for myself. Somewhere along the way, I traded in solitude for the facade that millennials erect of constant busyness, productivity, and social success. Sometimes weekends can feel more stressful than weekdays, as I try to pack in spending time with friends as efficiently as possible.

It appears I am not alone in this concern. It is almost unheard of for young people to purposefully spend a night alone for fear of seeming socially undesirable. I’ve found myself expressing shock and horror at the idea: I treat friends who choose to do so with concern and balk at doing the same. Socializing has become an end in and of itself, rather than a means to an end for overall happiness.

My New Year’s resolution is to embrace purposeful alone time. But, importantly, this alone time should also be time of real rest. I find that the time I do have to myself (mostly weeknights), I quickly stuff with a to do list and productive multi-tasking. If I sit down to catch up on a favorite show, I open and resize three other windows on my laptop so I can do freelance work while I watch TV. If I want to talk to a friend, I call while I prep my meals for later in the week. I schedule my workouts with friends so we can catch up in the meantime. All of this isn’t inherently bad, but my reflex multitasking leaves me with no time spent in stasis.

All of this leaves little time for reading and being still. In 2014, let’s resolve to get a little bit less done and work on respecting our own limitations a bit more.