On marriage: What are you waiting for?

It’s hard to imagine that marriage once marked the beginning of one’s adult life. For college students of my generation, marriage is seldom viewed as a gateway to adulthood. Rather, it’s understood as somewhat of a capstone—something to be reserved only for when we’ve completed our degree, pursued our dream career path, and established ourselves professionally.

In late May, The Daily Beast published a feature article entitled “What are you waiting for? The many cases for getting married younger” in which journalist Megan McArdle, who herself married in her late thirties, questions the notion that it’s best to delay marriage until we’re figured everything else out:

“These days, your 20s are not supposed to be for an ‘MRS degree’ or starting a family; they’re for finishing your education and finding yourself. Marriage used to be the event that marked your passage into adulthood—the cornerstone of an adult life. Now it’s the capstone, the last thing you do after all the other foundations are in place.

As someone who got married in her late 30s, I’m glad that women aren’t racing from commencement to get to the church on time. Nonetheless—again speaking as someone who got married in her late 30s—I think we might now be taking things a little too far. It isn’t that I think we’re missing our chance to get married. In fact, compared with 1930, the number of 50-year-olds who report never having married is actually a bit lower. Rather, I’m worried that if we keep pushing for ever-later marriage, it will come at an ever-higher cost.”

McArdle makes a strong case that marrying younger may not be such a bad idea after all. The full article is long, but well worth the read.

Are there benefits to waiting? Certainly. But perhaps delaying marriage isn’t as fool-proof a plan as it’s made out to be—and perhaps we should be more open to the idea of tying the knot a little earlier.