¡Que hermosa!

That time has finally come. I’ve just begun my semester abroad in Buenos Aires, Argentina, also known as the Paris of Latin America. Ya estoy encantada–I’m already loving the city.

One thing about Buenos Aires that I’m not quite sure I’m loving, however, is a very apparent difference in cultural norms regarding how men speak to women in public. Before I arrived, I received several warnings that men here are very forward and won’t hesitate to comment on a woman’s beauty or yell out flattering (perhaps I should write “flattering”) remarks as she walks down the street. In Buenos Aires, that sort of thing can fly, whereas in the United States, such behavior is certainly less than acceptable.

In the short time that I’ve been here, I’ve definitely learned that I was well-warned. I have on several occasions received standard piropos, or flirtatious remarks such as “¡Que linda!” or “Que hermosa, ¿te acompaño?” as I’m walking down the street. I don’t flatter myself. This doesn’t happen because I’m especially beautiful; it happens because that’s the culture here.

When men make such comments during the day, my instinct is to be annoyed. When they make such comments at nighttime, my instinct is to be frightened.

Living here has led me to question why my instinct is to be annoyed, and more importantly, why it is to be frightened. How sad it is that I, like so many other American women, have learned to fear men like this. How sad it is that I’ve come to instinctually interpret flirtatious remarks after sunset as threats of sexual violence. I have become so accustomed to fearing men at night that when porteños tell me I’m pretty, my heart rate literally spikes. Should a mere remark like that really incite such fear in me?